Dorky Like a Fox


So I’ve been brooding about the pages of 4chan’s /b/ forum because it’s the only place left on the internet that can consistently shock me with blatantly offensive and downright inappropriate material. (seriously, it’s a fucked up place, don’t go there if you are a decent person with any shreds of morality) I’ve seen a phrase mentioned a few times and not paid it much mind, until today. I looked up the definition of “cosplay”, and was informed it is a bunch of full grown adults dressing up like video game and anime characters, and going to conventions with each other.

Obviously my first instinct was to make fun of these people, cause let’s face it, that’s a weird hobby for a full grown person. (says the guy who’s been to more than one civil war reenactment, and who’s favorite holiday is Halloween) I tooled around and found some funny pictures of big fat wierdos dressed up like cartoons, and showed them to people, and that was pretty fun for a little while, but then I started to notice something. Something I didn’t expect to see at all. There was a ton of really hot chicks who go to these conventions and get into the costumes and everything.

I know what you’re thinking, hot chicks are naturally repulsed by anime and comic book fan boys. So what gives? To tell you the truth I have no idea. I myself used to be a total Star wars freak when I was younger. And after that I got into the Insane Clown Posse for a little while, which is without a doubt one of the lamest things anyone can do, ever. And much to my sadistic glee I discovered that Emerald used to collect Sailor Moon cards, which is almost as dorky as my past transgressions. So after I established that I have absolutely no street cred or any room to talk shit about other people doing uncool stuff in their free time. (Imagine me trying to explain to my redneck, blue collar, coworkers that I blog in my free time, or that I met my girlfriend online, or even what the internet is in the first place)

I suppose that there are just as many people of the cooter persuasion who are socially awkward and into dorky fiction as there are people of the wiener persuasion. And if you’re a chick who has a hard time making friends, and there’s an entire subculture of mostly available dudes who are into the same stuff you are, and would love to see you dress up like your favorite character, it’s probably very empowering. All of a sudden you become this character that’s strong or sexy or confident, and you become sought after and desired by your peers. Surely it must seem like heaven on earth for all the guys when they walk into some convention center and are surrounded by good lookin’ ladies dressed up like the digital creations they spank it to at night.

So here’s some pictures taken directly off cosplay.com proving that apparently there are hot chicks out there for any guy, no matter what you like. Thanks for keeping the dream alive ladies.

I have to say, I was impressed. Not just with the quality of the women folk, but also with their costumes. (and yes, some of those chicks were repeats, but I’m not so interested in cosplay chicks that I feel like spending forever searching their site for a plethora of eye candy) I love Halloween, and I usually put a fair amount of effort into my costume, but these people are incredible. I seriously have no idea how they make some of this stuff. I didn’t even know women still knew how to sow. (Oooh! Sick burn on modern women!) (Not really, that was weak as hell)

Let’s be real though, most guys don’t want to bang some chick dressed in full anime regalia, so for the rest of us, here’s a picture of Brianna Michaels and Brandy Taylor rubbing boobies. (Emerald, if you can ever bring one of these two home … well we’d work something out. Especially Brianna Michaels cause I think she looks like you and we could pretend you two were twins or something. Not the identical twins, but the other kind, who look slightly different but still have those freaky twin mind powers)

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7 responses to “Dorky Like a Fox

  1. Ha, yeah, cause I’ve totally got a ski-jump nose *rolls eyes*

    And I don’t care what you say about the Internet being the high seas and defending oneself, I’m putting the warning out:

    PEOPLE!!! YOU NEED A REALLY GOOD ANTIVIRUS PROGRAM IF YOU’RE GOING ON 4CHAN!!!!!!

    Day 1) Norton advises me to update for the millionth time ever. Ignore it, totally forgetting that my version is way outdated.

    Day 2) Go surfing on 4chan. Get hooked.

    Day 14) MY LAPTOP IS A BRICK!!!! I’M INFESTED WITH A VIRUS THAT LOOKS SO MUCH LIKE WINDOWS ANTIVIRUS THAT I DON’T NOTICE UNTIL TALEA POINTS OUT THAT IT SAYS ‘FOUNDED SPYWARE’!!!! AND ITS TOO LATE AND EVEN MY SUPER NERDY WEBMASTER CAN’T FIX IT!!!

    I. Was. Pissed.

    And um…yeah…the Sailor Moon thing…I was in Grade Eight. But um, if you still find it hot….then um…yeah, well, we can go from there šŸ˜‰

  2. is this website with all the pics Canadian? ‘Cause I swear that the “7 of hearts” playing-card chick looks exactly like someone I went to high school with….wow…either she has a twin, or she leads a double life, lol….

  3. šŸ˜Æ Is it just me or do a couple/few of those chicks look like dudes???

  4. Em: you can say what you want, but you still look like Brianna Michaels. The internet is the new high seas, and you can warn people about whatever you want, but as far as I’m concerned it’s their job to make sure their computers are safely protected when surfing aboot. And I thought you got that virus while looking at porn with me.

    Romi: I don’t know if that chick was Canadian or not, but a lot of the people on the sight were. It was mostly people from the USA, Canada, England, Italy, and Germany. At least in the section I checked out.

    Peter Parkour: If any of those are dudes, they are bangable dudes. I think it might just be cause they have too much make up on to look like the characters, and therefore end up looking like drag queens.

  5. “I suppose that there are just as many people of the cooter persuasion who are socially awkward and into dorky fiction as there are people of the wiener persuasion.” That sentence made me laugh so hard I almost had Coke come flying out of my nose! Josh, you are just too funny!

    Also, ultimate nerd convention is… The Ren Faire. I’ve gone twice and will probably never, ever go to one again. The people there are weird and get way to into it and it’s also full of dirty old men…. with bad teeth and hair. Actually… the more I think about it.. I might have to take Lyn so we can spend all day making fun of people! Haha because I am an asshole like that!

  6. Yeah that too šŸ˜‰ Chicka chicka bow wow

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